My Birthday Surprise
by Lisa P

OK so this is the first time I have ever written something for public consumption beyond Facebook updates. I stumbled across WoL when I was looking for some kind of stimulation and it struck a chord with me. I am so glad there are others out there that have experienced what I have experienced or are at least interested in reading about it.


My name is Lisa and I live in England. I am now in my early 20s but the incident that changed me so much occurred when I was nineteen – to be precise it was my nineteenth birthday. I was working in the office of a local engineering company. It was quite a large company with maybe one hundred staff working in the factory and fifteen of us in the office. I was an accounts clerk and had been there since I left school a year before. I worked with another clerk called David who was a good laugh. He had been there for three years and never stopped moaning about how boring it was and how he had to leave soon.

Our boss was a fussy woman called Alison. She had been there about ten years and was never going to leave. She was seeing the very handsome foreman who ran the factory floor though he seemed to be less into her than she was into him.Alison enjoyed exercising her power over David and me, but especially over me. If I made a tiny mistake or even tried to re-format an accounts sheet in a different way she would loudly make a big deal about correcting me. Loud enough for the rest of the office to hear – it was embarrassing and that probably added to her pleasure. I don’t know what her problem was as I was a quiet unassuming person who worked hard and caused no trouble.

The rest of the office staff were OK. There were a couple of sales guys who were fun although they were often out of the office seeing clients. Karen who worked on reception was nice as was the graphic designer Jack. But my best friend there was Becky who was PA for Mr Ashcombe, the 60 year old who owned the company. Oh, and there was George Tucker the office pervert. OK maybe pervert is a bit harsh but he was a 40 year old who still lived with his mother and was renowned for letting his eyes wander downwards from the face when talking to his female colleagues. He was weird but harmless.

I wasn’t bothered about my birthday that day and nineteen isn’t a special one. However, it was usual to head down to the local pub after work with everyone from the office and occasionally some of the guys from the factory. Pretty much everyone from the office said they were coming that night which was a relief as it would be an embarrassing commentary on my popularity if it had been a low turnout. Alison’s boyfriend Jeff said that loads of his workmates from the factory floor were coming and that they were all up for a big session. In fact there was a big buzz around the place which was great as, although I am uncomfortable with being the centre of attention, it made me feel more secure. My friend Becky was a bit quiet and unenthusiastic but she was having boyfriend troubles again and I vowed to look after her that night.

I had made a bit of an effort for my birthday. I normally wore a trouser suit with heels at work but had worn a skirt for a change. It wasn’t short but was tight-fitting and showed my bum off really well. I had even worn stockings though I wasn’t sure why I bothered as I wasn’t seeing anyone and none of the men at work were flirting with me or anything. I am fairly shy and not particularly comfortable with men. I have only had one boyfriend – just after I left school - and we only went out together for a few weeks. Enough time to lose my virginity but getting dumped by him didn’t help my confidence. I am fairly plain looking but I do have a great body – I have looked at porn on the Web so I knew what men liked and what body types they thought were hot. I knew that I ticked all the boxes: long legs, firm and toned body despite never exercising and full but very firm breasts. Judging by the women I saw on porn sites men seem to prefer women shaved between the legs – so I shaved the night before my Birthday. I hadn’t got physical with a boy for almost a year but I thought that it would be good to dress sexily for once even if only I got to appreciate it!

Just before lunch my friend Becky came over and said that the boss, Mr Ashcombe, needed to see someone from Accounts immediately to explain some figures. Alison and David were going over unpaid invoices with the head of sales in a meeting room in the other building on the site so I had to go. I was really nervous as Alison always dealt with Mr Ashcombe and if she was on holiday then the more experienced David would deputise. I offered to go and find Alison but Becky said that I shouldn’t keep her boss waiting. So I went into his office.

Mr Ashcombe has a reputation for being rather remote and traditional as bosses go. He had inherited the company from his father and had never had to work his way up. However, he was a fair man apparently, although I had never dealt with him directly other than saying “hello” or “good morning” to him if our paths crossed occasionally in the office. I walked over to his office trying to keep calm. Wearing a skirt and stockings in the office for the first time didn’t help – it felt strange not wearing trousers and I felt quite self-conscious.

I knocked on Mr Ashcombe’s office and went in.

“Ah, Lisa isn’t it?” he said looking surprised to see me.

“Yes sir, Alison is in a meeting but I hope that I can help”.

“I am sure that you can,” he replied and showed me an Excel file and some numbers that he didn’t understand. To be honest, it was quite simple for anyone in Accounts to understand and I must have explained it fairly well as he was pleased with me.

He sat back are asked me how long I had been in the company. I replied that I had been there for about a year as I had joined just after I turned 18 and I was 19 that day.

“Ah, it is your birthday today. Congratulations. And how will you be celebrating this momentous day?”

“Well pretty much everyone in the office is going to The Red Lion after work for the traditional drinks,” I replied.

He sat there for a few seconds before replying. “Might I join you all tonight, I haven’t met everyone for a long while and I think that I owe you a drink for your help today.”

“Er, yes, of course,” I mumbled, rather shocked as apart from the Christmas party Mr Ashcombe never came out socially with his staff.

“Excellent, I shall look forwards to it, and thank you for your help with the accounts.”

”OK we will see you later,” and with that I left his office, closing the door gently behind me.

I stopped by Becky’s desk and told her. She was surprised and looked a bit concerned but I assured her that she shouldn’t worry about having her boss there as he would probably leave early and he wouldn’t see us in an inebriated state! She said that she hoped so and I returned to my desk.

Alison and David came back from their meeting half an hour later and I told her about me having to help Mr Ashcombe with the accounts report. She was not happy and demanded to know why I hadn’t gone and fetched her. I explained that there had been no time but she was clearly annoyed that I had covered for her so easily. She sat there with a scowl on her face and ignored me for the rest of the afternoon. God I needed a drink or two!

At last five o’clock came and my usual drink of Southern Comfort and Lemonade beckoned.

“Right,” said David, “let’s go and get drunk!”

I closed down my PC, looked out of the window at the blazing late afternoon sun, decided to leave my jacket and headed off with David and Becky.

“We should get something to eat on the way and line our stomachs,” Becky suggested, unusually sensible for her.

“We should but we won’t, I need a drink and I can’t wait,” I replied. “Good girl, Lisa I am with you on that,” said David.

With that, the three of us set off telling the others that we would meet them there. Five minutes later we were in The Red Lion. It was fairly busy but someone had reserved the best tables for us, right in the middle of the bar, so as David got the first round of drinks Becky and I settled down and waited. David was served by the good-looking barman – the one I fancied, but other than ordering drinks off him dozens of time I had been too shy to ever talk to him. As it was my birthday David got me a double Southern Comfort and lemonade which I polished off in a couple of minutes. Becky got the next round – another double - and that was almost gone by the time the rest of the office turned up. The alcohol began to relax me and it was really good fun with everyone (except Alison) buying me drinks. In fact after an hour I was feeling a bit drunk already when two of the sales guys I was chatting with looked at something over my shoulder and grinned.

I turned to see what they were grinning at. Standing behind me was a policeman. “You are Lisa Portis?” he asked.

“Er, yes why?” I answered feeling nervous although I hadn’t done anything wrong.

“Well there has been an incident and I believe that you can help us.”

Then it clicked. The ‘policeman’ had an orange permatan and a big grin, and now I looked properly it wasn’t a real uniform. He was a strippergram! My mind raced. Someone had organised a strippergram for Mark, one of the factory apprentices, for his leaving do last Christmas. Everyone had given a fiver to his workmates who were organising his leaving party here in the Red Lion. It has been quite funny and Mark had taken it well laughing and playing along with the occasion. But he had ended up standing in his boxer shorts with his trousers around his ankles while a woman dressed as Santa Claus stripped in front of him. OK so she ended up naked while he had just stood there and watched. And yes everyone thought he had been a ‘good laugh’ about it but he still ended up in his boxers! But he was a bloke and it was normal for them to end up scantily dressed, while the female strippergram did her thing. Surely they wouldn’t go so far for a woman? I felt nervous – I was wearing stockings and was not planning on letting everyone in the pub see me dressed-up like that!

I saw Alison standing with Mr Ashcombe and a group of my office colleagues. She smiled at me – a malicious smile that showed that she had been very involved in organising my birthday entertainment. I tried to smile despite my predicament. My work colleagues formed a wide circle around us but leaving space for everyone else in the pub to watch the entertainment if they wanted.

The ‘policeman’ in front of me winked at me and tried to put me at ease: the panic must have shown on my face. He spoke loudly so the whole pub could hear. “Well Miss Portis, the person involved seems to fit your description. I need to check so can I just have a look at your blouse?”

“Er sure,” I replied.

“So please pass it over.”

Well I had a tube top underneath so that was OK. I unbuttoned my blouse and passed it over, with a forced smile. In return I received a loud cheer from all my colleagues and seemingly every male in the pub. I suddenly needed another Southern Comfort. The policeman passed my blouse behind him – Alison took it from him and waved it at me with a grin.

“Right miss, I am sorry but I am going to have to hold you here for questioning,” and out of a pocket he produced a pair of handcuffs! This produced a loud cheer from the audience and a weak smile from me. He moved me against the bar and told me to place my hands behind my back. He placed a cuff on one hand, it was tight but not painful. Then putting the chain over the brass rail that ran along the edge of the top of the bar he expertly slipped the other cuff over my free hand securing me against the bar. My hands were quite high behind my back, it wasn’t painful but it would be if I stayed like that for too long. Most worrying of all though was that I was defenceless.

“OK Miss Portis, I have had reports from your boss that you are suspected of stealing office supplies from your place of employment.”

“No,” “shame,” “shocking,” came the mock cries from my colleagues around me.

“I’ll give you one more chance to come clean,” he offered.

“I am innocent,” I claimed.

“But isn’t that the outline of an office marker pen I can see there?”

“What?” I replied.

“I think it is,” shouted one of the sales guys, “you’d better check!” I gave him my best withering look.

“I am afraid I will,” said the policeman. With a smile he started patting me down pretending to search me. He gave my breasts a big squeeze which brought more cheers from around the pub.

“Yes, we have a suspicious object here,” he announced, still with both hands on my breasts. “I am sorry madam but your boss insists that I retrieve any stolen materials.”

“Oh I definitely do!” called Alison, obviously relishing my embarrassment.

I was still watching her with barely concealed contempt when the policeman held both sides of my tube top and pulled it down over my bra. He kept pulling it down over my waist, over my skirt and down to my ankles. Looking up he suggested that I step out of my top as the floor wasn’t very clean for a white top. In a state of shock I lifted each foot up and watched as my top flew over his shoulder to be neatly caught by Alison. Wolf whistles broke out around the pub. I could feel my face burning red with embarrassment. I looked down and saw my cleavage, looking impressive as it was pushed up by my strapless bra.

“No, it wasn’t there,” the policeman announced with a mock puzzled look on his face. “I can tell by your blushing that you have something to hide and it would be unprofessional of me to stop now.”

I looked up and saw Becky by the bar. She gave me a commiserating smile. She knew I wasn’t enjoying it but she had seen strippergrams before and knew the drill. There was nothing anyone could do – I just had to smile and endure. I was going to end up standing in the pub in a sexy bra and knickers set with pull up stockings and heels on. I was going to look a right tart and all my colleagues, and even complete strangers in the pub, would see! I felt light –headed and thought that I might faint. I couldn’t move, my hands were held high above my waist and I was defenceless.

Suddenly I was aware that the policeman was down on his knees in front of me with his hands on my arse, then his hands were on my skirt zipper and then it was being unzipped. I looked down at him trying to catch his eye so that I could plead with him to stop. But he just looked directly at my crotch area as my skirt was slowly tugged downwards. It was a tight fitting skirt and he gave a hard tug to get it going. I felt my knickers catch and start to be pulled down but thankfully the skirt slipped over them and headed slowly down my legs. I had to step out of my skirt and watch as it was passed to the grateful hands of my boss.

The policeman stood up, stepped back and turned to the crowd: “Well that is the best-looking suspect I have seen in a long time!”

Judging by the whistles and shouts from around the pub they were clearly impressed. If I didn’t feel so sick with nerves I would have been pleased I guess. All around me my colleagues were clicking their mobile phone cameras to record my embarrassment. Most of the factory staff hadn’t come as they didn’t ever come into contact with accounts people in the office but undoubtedly they would be seeing me in my lingerie soon enough once those images started flying around the internet. Bloody Alison, I hated her, and anyone else who helped arrange this.

All around the pub everyone was watching me. Even couples on tables on the far side had stopped talking to enjoy my shame. The pub door opened and two men walked in. I recognised them instantly although I hadn’t seen them since I had left school last year. The younger one was my old English teacher Mr Bennett, and the older one – he must have been 60 and approaching retirement – was the Head of English Mr Pards. They stopped in their tracks, smiling in pleasure at a scantily clad woman standing in the pub. Mr Bennett nudged his department head as he recognised me and I could see him explaining who I was to before they both had a good laugh. Eventually Mr Pards went to the bar to get their drinks while Mr Bennett edged over to where my colleagues were enjoying the entertainment.

“Well I am clearly going to have to change my approach with this suspect,” announced the 'policeman'.

He clicked his fingers in the direction of the bar and a barman, clearly prepared, pressed play and the pub was filled with the song from The Full Monty. The policeman began to dance in front of me and slowly removed his jacket. I forced a smile onto my face – well at least he was stripping now and all the attention would move to him. I wondered how far he would go. The female strippergram at Christmas has gone completely naked before rubbing herself all over Mark. I guessed that as long as I kept smiling and playing along it would all be over in five minutes then I could get dressed and drink and drink and drink!

His shirt came off next revealing a fantastic torso. All the women in the pub were giving him their full attention though I noticed that most of the men were still eyeing me up.

The policeman’s trousers came off with a single pull, just like in The Full Monty, leaving him just wearing a ridiculous looking posing pouch. It wasn’t sexy but I guess it was there to get a laugh – everyone in the pub was laughing except me. I was finding it really hard to force a smile onto my face. He danced around in front of me working the crowd. The women were loving it and the men were laughing too, but were watching me as much as the strippergram. I noticed Mr Ashcombe sipping a glass of red wine and watching me intently. How was I ever going to face the office again? I would have to go off sick tomorrow and get another job fast. Then I snapped back to what was happening in front of me.

The strippergram had come right up to me and was rubbing his posing pouch against my knickers. The crowd were roaring with laughter and he was lapping it up. He danced alongside me and rubbed himself against my hand behind my back. He whispered loudly in my ear so I could hear above the music: “Hold the string at the top”. I couldn’t move my cuffed hand but could just feel some cord and a bow at the top of his posing pouch. I certainly didn’t want to feel any lower!

He moved away from me and the bow unravelled, leaving the posing pouch in my hands. He stood there naked with a mock look of astonishment on his face and pointed at the posing pouch in my hand. He danced around in front of me, his penis bouncing all over the place. He rubbed himself against my knickers and the crowd roared in approval. Then he turned and faced them and rubbed his backside against me. I just grimaced and looked at the ceiling. It was almost over and then I could get a drink or three and leave as soon as was socially acceptable.

It seemed that everyone of my colleagues was taking photos of myself and my Birthday surprise. He stood alongside me and put his arm around me and posed unashamedly. It was awful and I had nowhere to look. One of the telesales women came up right up to us to get a close-up of the stripper’s penis to great cheers from all. Drunk though I was, all I could think of was where would those pictures end up? Everyone has seen those embarrassing drunk photos on social media sites everywhere. Undoubtedly my non-work friends would end up seeing me standing in sexy lingerie in the middle of a pub being cuddled by a naked man!

I guess it was the alcohol dulling my senses but I never felt it happening. The stripper had his hand behind my back and one-hendedly he unclipped the clasp of my bra. Being strapless it just popped off and fell on the floor in front of me. One second I was standing there embarrassed and the next I was humiliated.

I gasped; my colleagues gasped. Then they cheered. It sounded like everyone was cheering but I couldn’t tell as was looking studiously at the floor, although blocking much of my view were my full breasts, the large nipples proud and erect for all to see. The stripper gave me a firm hug which almost made me lose my balance and made my breasts bounce much to the delight of the men in the pub. I looked up. The first person I saw was David, he gave me a wink and a thumbs-up. I sat next to him for most days of the year and we got on very well as friends but I never wanted him to see me topless. Standing next to him was Mr Ashcombe who was unashamedly admiring me from top to toe. He raised his glass of wine to me in a mock salute. Concentrate on your breathing I told myself, keep calm and it will be over soon and then I can be off home. I tried to keep a smile of resignation on my face as the camera flashes went almost continually. Why had someone invented camera phones?

I looked to my left and there was Alison’s boyfriend Jeff looking very impressed with the view in front of him and taking a few photos for his own collection. Alison, over the other side of the crowd had also noticed this. She came storming over and prodded him hard in the chest. I couldn’t hear what she was saying but she was clearly not happy – I guessed that I looked a lot better topless than she did. I actually smiled for real – the first time since this ordeal started. Alison turned around and caught me watching and smiling. She made no attempt to disguise her anger.

She turned to David and whispered in his ear. He frowned. She kept talking to him and he shrugged as if in acceptance. Not catching my eye he turned to some of the other lads in the office and said something encouragingly to them. They grinned back at him, and almost as one they turned towards where the strippergram and I were standing and started chanting, “We want more, we want more!”

More! No way. I turned to the stripper and begged him: “I have suffered enough, come on let me go.”

He was a bit of a showman, I guess you have to be with that job. He stepped in front of the crowd and cupped his hand to his ear as if he couldn’t hear. It seemed that every man in the pub was now chanting: “we want more.” Mr Bennett and Mr Pards, the two barmen, including the gorgeous one that I fancied, and even the complete strangers were chanting. A fair number of the girls were too, getting into the general merriment and having a laugh with the men.

The stripper theatrically shook his head and went to pick up my bra. Getting some clothes back on would be the best moment of my life for sure. He stopped, looked like he was hesitating then, with a smile, waved their demands away. “Boo,” cried some of the men. I was saved and thought that I must buy him a drink once I had my clothes on and those bloody handcuffs off. Suddenly Alison marched up to him, took my bra off of him, handed him a £20 note and asked him to see the job through. He took the money with a smile and turned towards me. I am sure my heart stopped in shock. Someone started chanting, “Off, off, off”. Seemingly the whole pub took up the chant. The women had seen full frontal nudity and the men wanted the same. But the stripper chose to be naked and was paid for it, while I was hating every second of this – and it was my birthday! I strained against the handcuffs and begged the stripper to leave me alone. I was desperate but tried to cover it up a little for the benefit of appearing a little cool.

The stripper knelt down beside me and put an arm behind me. He held both sides of my knickers at the sides. “Well?” he asked the crowd.

“Off, off, off,” they replied.

He pulled them down an inch – if I hadn’t shaved last night there would have been pubic hair showing to everyone around me.

“Enough?” he asked again.

“No,” came a chorus of replies.

I saw Becky in the crowd and could see that she felt my pain, but strippergrams and the accompanying humiliation are a British tradition and everyone was supposed to ‘have a laugh’ so she wouldn’t intervene.

I felt another tug on my knickers and I could feel them come down a little further. My crack was almost exposed and everyone in the pub could tell now that I was shaved down there. How had this happened? This was my birthday, I was supposed to be having fun!

Alison stood there with a triumphant look on her face. She nodded encouragingly to the stripper to finish the job and with a sickening feeling I felt my knickers slowly lower revealing my shaven private parts to some 50 people. My face was burning red with embarrassment as my knickers were lowered down my thighs. I looked up and saw Mr Ashcombe watching intently. Pretty much every man from my workplace was watching with a mixture of shock, that they were looking at a colleague naked, and finding pleasure in the view. It is a strange feeling to know that dozens of people are looking directly at your most private parts and I felt a tingling down there in response to this unusual situation. The stripper tugged at my knickers when they reached my high heeled shoes. I couldn’t see the point in resisting any more so I lifted first one shoe, and then the other, and my knickers flew over his shoulder where they were caught by my hateful boss.

I was getting a little teary but I tried to put a brave face on it, looking up to the ceiling and wishing I wasn’t there. Everyone could see my most private parts, the parts that none of them should ever have seen.

I was at least receiving very appreciative comments from everyone around me. If I was an exhibitionist I would have loved being able to show off my great body without anyone accusing me of showing off as I clearly hadn’t wanted to be there. My colleagues were suddenly laughing and I looked down and there was George Tucker living up to his pervy reputation. He was on his knees just two feet, from me taking close-up photos of my pussy on his mobile phone. I laughed. I actually laughed at the situation. It was so bad that I just had to go with it.

“Anyone else want a close-up?” I asked with weary resignation and a weak smile.

David bounded up to me, put his arm around my shoulders and asked someone to take a photo for him. After him, came one of the sales guys who posed for the photo with his mouth open and tongue near a breast so it looked like he was licking my very erect nipples. After him came pervy George again who put his arm around my waist – I could feel his clammy hand shaking as someone took a photo for him using his phone.

Next came Jeff, giving me a peck on the cheek and a pinch on the bottom while some of his mates took photos. Alison flipped. She stood watching with unconcealed anger then turned and stormed out of the pub. Everyone thought it was funny and gave Jeff some encouraging support: “good riddance,” “freedom at last” and “congratulations” were among the many comments and I realised that the bitch was not a particularly popular person at work.

Unbelievably Mr Bennett walked over to me and put his arm around my shoulders while his fellow teacher took a photo for him. “That’s one for the staff room tomorrow,” he whispered. “Teachers are always interested in what their former pupils are up to and how they have changed,” he said with a wink. My work colleagues didn’t know who he was but just thought it was funny that compete strangers were coming up to me for a photo. This went on for five minutes until everyone had enough photos.

Finally the stripper, now fully dressed, came up to me dangling a key in front of him. “Happy Birthday, and I hope it wasn’t too bad,” he remarked, as if he hadn’t just humiliated me in front of everyone I spend most of my days with. He reached behind and seconds later the cuffs were off. I rubbed my hands trying to erase the red lines in them from where I had pulled hard in a futile attempt to escape from them. David came up to me with a neat double Southern Comfort. I didn’t even feel it as it went down, to more cheers from my colleagues. Becky came up to me with another, which at least had a mixer in it, and offered her commiserations.

“Sorry I couldn’t tell you what going to happen – I was sworn to secrecy. We all had to put in a fiver, it was Alison’s idea but pretty much everyone in the office was up for it. Still you look amazing. I mean seriously fantastic. You should change your wardrobe and show what you have got a little more.”

“Well no need now is there – everyone knows what I‘ve got!” I retorted, though with a smile. It could not get any worse. Everyone had seen me but I was getting constant approving looks and comments so I forced myself to go with it and keep a smile on my face. “Seriously though, where are my clothes?”

“I’ll go get them.”

While Becky disappeared into the crowd I was surrounded by well-wishers from my office. Everyone said that I had been a great sport (though I hadn’t any choice but I had tried to smile) and everyone kept going on about how amazing I looked. I just stood in my high heels swaying slightly as too much alcohol on an empty stomach kicked in. After a few minutes I was not even bothered that I was naked. Everyone was chatting animatedly to me and both of my hands were holding drinks. I posed for a few more photos with friends from the office, accepting that I had lost all dignity and just going with it. I saw a guy over the other side of the bar who wasn’t with us trying to sneak a photo of me. I marched over to where he was standing, stood right in front of him, and offered him a free unobstructed photo of me! He looked really embarrassed but he still took a photo. I no longer cared, in fact I liked that he was more embarrassed than me. As I walked back to my friends I could feel that I was a little wet between my legs.

Becky came up to me looking worried and said that Alison has stormed off with all my clothes. Unbelievable, just how bad could things get? “Don’t worry,” she said, “we’ll sort something out.”

Although I wasn’t sure what, it was a very hot summer day and none of the women had jackets or anything that they could spare. Still I have to admit that I was beginning to enjoy myself. I couldn’t believe the comments that I was getting from all the men around me and being a lot drunker than I should have been I was quite flirty back. Flirting is so unlike me but it was a strange night. To spend most of your life being ignored by men then suddenly be the centre of attention from a dozen men at once was as intoxicating as the Southern Comfort that I was consuming.

After a few minutes of overt flirting with my colleagues a voice from behind me called out: “Why don’t you bring that perfect arse come over here and sit with us for a bit?” It was Jeff who was sitting with his workmates.

I turned around and offered my condolences for the way his girlfriend had stormed off but he was completely dismissive of it.

“It has been coming a long while. She is too high maintenance and it feels great to be free as I have been dreading telling her it was over for weeks. In fact you brought it all to a head tonight – and in the best possible way! Come on, come and sit with us for a bit.”

“Wow, you just get better and better,” Jeff said as I edged drunkenly between two of his friends to get to the empty sofa. Looking forward to getting off my feet I sat down very heavily but as I did I felt something hard and cold slip inside my very wet pussy. I guess I was too drunk to react quickly and I felt it shoot right up inside me as I sank down onto the sofa.

“Whoops,” laughed one of the guys sitting next to me. My alcohol-delayed reaction finally kicked in. I leant backwards falling onto my back. I spread my legs wide and pushed my fingers into me to grab whatever was in there. It was right up inside me. I could feel a flat surface but it was smooth and I couldn’t get a grip on it as my pussy was incredibly slimy. I guess the whole being naked in front of flirty men had affected me more that I thought. It seemed like ages that I was trying to get a grip on it and I felt a bit panicky as I had no idea what it was. I used my other hand as well to try to get purchase on it. I was vaguely aware that everyone around me had gone quiet. Then it budged slightly and I managed to get a finger on each side of the object. A few more seconds passed while I desperately pulled at it but with just the ends of two fingers to grip it kept slipping. Then suddenly it came free and I pulled it quickly out of me. With a very loud slurping noise out came a small coke bottle that someone had used as a drinks mixer.

I held it up in front of me in relief and triumph. In front of me stood Mr Ashcombe and pretty much most of my colleagues from the office. I held the small bottle up to show them that I had been trying to remove something that I didn’t want there - and they all stood there mouths agape. Well I was lying on my back, my legs spread and had been vigorously forcing my hands into my pussy for all to see. It sunk in that they didn’t realise that the man next to me had guided it into me as I drunkenly sat down - they assumed that I was entertaining Jeff and his friends! Masturbating for their entertainment! There I lay holding up a clearly slimy Coke bottle with a look of triumph on my face. As the camera flashes started again I just lay back on the sofa in defeat. Laughter ripped through the pub – again I was the object of the joke.

Eventually I sat up. I smiled back at my audience and sought consolation in another drink. My head was beginning to swim now but I remember Jeff was really nice to me. He offered to get me a taxi and as I stood up he took his shirt off and offered it to me. There were a few “boos” as I put it on but I think that I had entertained the crowd enough. Good to his word, Jeff steered me through the crowded pub, letting me stop for a friendly Birthday kiss with colleagues, and out into the street.

From that moment on my evening got a whole lot better. My memory from here on in is a bit hazy as I really was drunk now but we were all over each other in the taxi and we ended up back at his house. I do remember a night of fantastic sex and in the morning, after he had begged me to go out with him (which I accepted readily) he drove me back to mine to get dressed for work. Yes I walked back into the office on time that morning. I think I would have phoned in sick if it wasn’t for Jeff, but he made me feel great and I didn’t care about my Birthday horror show now.

I was amazingly relaxed as I walked into the office and apart from a few knowing grins everyone else was quite cool about it too. Lots of people asked me how I was feeling and to be honest, although I was hung over and very tired, I felt alright. After all, I had captured my boss’ boyfriend and he was lovely and seemingly very into me. Not that I could tell anyone. I got to my desk and looked over at David, he was pretending to read something but I noticed that the background on his PC had been changed from our company logo to a picture of me spread-eagled on the pub sofa.

“Very funny,” I remarked.

“I guess I ought to remove it before Mr Ashcombe comes in but it is a great view!”

I sat at my desk and looked around the room. I kept catching the men in the office looking at me. I knew that they had been impressed with what they had seen of me last night – well my body, if not the masturbation show I had unintentionally put on! I noticed that all of the men were looking at me with new found admiration but I was not interested. I couldn’t believe I was now seeing my boss’ gorgeous boyfriend.

Around ten o’clock Mr Ashcombe came over to David and me. He asked how I was and I said that I was OK but would not be celebrating my Birthday in the Red Lion anymore! Mr Ashcombe said that he must come out with us more often as he had seen a different side of some of his staff last night. I blushed at the innuendo. He said that the reason why he had come over was to let us know that Alison had phoned in sick that day. Apparently she had personal problems to sort out.

Jeff had said that he was going to phone her as soon as he had dropped me off that morning. I found out later that she hadn’t taken it well. In fact, when she came in the next week she was very subdued and didn’t even have the heart to be mean to me. A few weeks later Jeff and I admitted to the office that we were seeing each other. When Alison heard she was clearly shocked but didn’t say anything. She continued to be her usual unpleasant self but less than a month later she resigned to join another company. She never had a leaving party which was a shame as I knew exactly what entertainment I would have organised for it!

The End

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