As you may have inferred from this chronicle, I am very much in lust with Amy. It cant have passed your attention that I have wanted to spend time alone with her, almost since the beginning of this trip. To be honest, these feelings came upon me a lot earlier in our relationship, as we got to know each other online.
So, now that I had Amy alone, with the prospect of at least a couple of days of uninterrupted fun, you'd think I'd have that girl chained down to a bunk and satisfying my lust before her Master got a hundred yards into the bush.
Well, sorry to disappoint you but at that moment I wasn't thinking of the nubile piece of womanhood who stood next to me at the rail. While I was in lust with Amy, I was in LOVE with Laura.
My thoughts and feelings were full of her.
I did glance at Amy, and suspected that her thoughts may have been similar to mine, except her focus would have been on Ben. She looked up at me at that moment, and gave me a smile. But there was a tenseness between us now, as if there were things expected of both of us yet we weren't sure how to get started, or even if we wanted to.
"So, what now?" I said to her with a weak smile of my own.
"Shouldn't I be asking that, Sir?" Amy replied.
I watched her lovely face and thought for a moment. "Tell you what, let's put aside the Master/slave thing for a while, okay? We haven't really spent time as friends yet this trip, and I know we both enjoy that part of our relationship."
Some genuine warmth flowed into her smile, I liked it.
"You serious, Sir?" she asked. "Just friends for a while?"
"Yes!" I said warmly, and was surprised when Amy jumped into my arms and gave me a big wet kiss!
"Oh, Don, thank you! I was wondering if we would ever get to talk as friends. It's hard to stay in slave girl mode the whole time even though Ben said it would be appropriate!"
I laughed. "It's okay, Amy. You can act normally now."
"Thanks, Don! It means a lot to me to be your friend, and I was wondering if I would get a chance!"
"No problem. In fact," I let go of her and took a step back, taking in the full sight of the nude young woman, "in fact why don't you go below and find a dress to wear. Crank up the A/C too, it's getting hot again!"
"Sure, Don!" Amy took a last look at the island and then went below.
I took a last look too, wished my wife luck, and followed her inside.
I was hungry, so I went straight to the galley. All of our food had been prepared by the women so far this trip, but I felt like cooking. So after seeing what Ben had left us I decided that I could make a couple of pretty good omelets.
I was chopping some peppers when Amy came out of her cabin, she had taken the time to shower, probably washing away the residue of all the sexual play she had enjoyed today. She looked good in a dark blue cotton dress, sleeveless, it also had no back. Like Laura in her fur bikini, it took clothes to make me realize how beautifully sexy Amy really was. I wondered if she picked out that dress to show me that she couldn't be wearing much of anything under it. An outfit like that only emphasized her hidden nudity.
"You shouldn't be cooking, Sir!" Amy said when she saw me.
"I WANT to cook, and it's Don, remember?"
"Oh, sorry, force of habit." she said with a grin.
"You thirsty?" I asked.
"Oh yeah, and hungry too. What are you making?"
I told her, fishing out of the tiny fridge a can of pop for her and a beer for myself.
She took the can and opened it, before settling onto the built in bench seat across the aisle from the galley. She tucked her long legs up under her and half sat, half knelt on the seat. Picture perfect.
She toyed with the can while I mixed the eggs, neither of us in the mood to talk, yet needing the company.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Amy asked eventually.
"About what?"
"Ben, and Laura."
"Do you?"
Amy sat in thought, and shook her head. I melted a tablespoon of butter in a pan and tipped the egg mixture in after it.
I felt...awkward, for want of a better word. I could have taken over the situation here, switched to Dom mode and given Amy orders that would have covered our time together without a problem. We would have slipped back into those comfortable roles and would even have had a good time!
Yet, I felt, and still feel, that there are times when you need to step out of what is comfortable in order to get to know a person properly. You may be able to get them to tell you their life story by cracking a whip, but you will never find out HOW that life story shaped the person you are with, unless you allowed them the freedom to be themselves.
What?
Some of you are arguing, "what if the person really is a submissive with no interest or feelings in acting like a normal person?"
Well hey! That's okay! But you never would have known for sure if you hadn't given them the freedom to find out.
I let the omelet cook almost through before flipping it, adding the chopped vegetables and ham to the cooked side while the other side kept on cooking. Low heat, that's the secret to a good omelet.
After a minute I folded the whole thing in half, slid it onto a plate and moved half of that onto another plate for Amy.
"Grub up!" I said, and I collected what I needed to eat at the table.
Amy followed with her food, hesitating before seating herself next to me.
"It's good!" she said with a smile after taking a couple of bites. I watched surprised, while she ate with her fingers. I shouldn't have been. I knew that utensils were the exception for her rather than the rule, by order of Ben, but seeing her actually eat like that when the slave rules were supposedly 'relaxed', was unexpected. I didn't comment on it though, I simply watched with amusement as those delicate fingers picked through her meal, and thought to myself that this might be a good rule to place Laura under, it looked quite lovely.
"Thanks." I answered, taking a swig of my beer as I watched her.
I saw her eyes follow the bottle, and remembered that she too was an alcoholic.
"I'm sorry." I said. "Ben told me it didn't bother him if I drank, but he didn't say anything about you!"
"It's okay, you can drink it." she said, looking at her plate.
"DOES it bother you?" In the back of my mind I wondered what would happen if she drank it, what she might be like as a drunk. I wasn't proud of the thought but it was there anyway. Don't you think about such things at times, deep in the dark recesses of your minds where things live you would never talk about?
Amy's answer was a good one. "It doesn't bother me near as much as what would happen to me if I gave in to the temptation."
"What would happen?"
Amy ate a finger full of egg before replying. "You've...taken a good look at my body," she said blushing a little, "did you notice the scar?"
Images of her bare flesh flowed through my mind, how it looked, how it felt, how it smelled. "The ones on your arms?" I asked.
She said no, and subconsciously tried to mask the faint remnants of the track marks inside her elbows.
I couldn't think of any other marks on her body, and told her so.
Amy turned her back to me. She pulled the back of her dress away from her to reveal the tops of her buttocks. "Look close, on the left."
I did so, and saw just to one side of where her butt crease started, a small well healed scar.
"I see it." I told her.
She moved back to her plate. "It's not much to see right now, but I got it four years ago.
I had just come home from a shitty day waiting tables...Oh! I'm sorry Sir, I didn't mean to swear!" Amy looked at me worriedly. Swearing was one of the first things Ben and I outlawed for our women.
"Go on, we'll deal with that later." I said to her, implying that even though we were not acting the parts she was still subject to discipline for those house rules I knew her to placed under. I knew I could have skipped it, but neither Ben nor Amy would have respected me for it.
"Er...well, it wasn't a good day. Ben had me working at this Diner and the less you wore the better the tips were, you know? Well wearing less also meant getting propositioned more and that day I just wasn't in the mood.
On my way home I had to walk past a liquor store, and for some reason that day I just stopped.
I...don't really remember going in, but I do remember walking up and down the aisles, running a finger along all the bottles. I ended up standing at the counter with a fifth of scotch and before I knew it my tips for the day were exchanged for a bottle of bliss."
Amy had stopped eating and sat staring at her plate. I could see that in her mind's eye she was back there, living it again.
"I remember," she continued, "the way that bottle bumped against my side, I had slipped it into the pocket of this big old coat Ben had got for me. With each step I was reminded over and over again of it's presence.
I thought to myself that I would take it home, open it, and show my will power by pouring it out. I felt I could do that.
I knew Ben would be mad at me if he found out I had bought it at all, but he didn't need to find out if I poured it out.
So I took it home, although later I wished that I had poured it out right then. Up in our little apartment I opened the bottle and stood over the sink with it.
I couldn't move.
I could smell it, the scotch.
I had been dry and drug free for a year by then, pretty good huh? It was...an effort...but Ben saw me through and I depended on him a lot for my will power. But...
It had been a sh...bad day.
I figured that, given the day I had, just one swig wouldn't hurt. You know, one quick mouthful of booze and while I savored it I could pour the rest away. I could do that, it was easy.
Yet, a moment later I still stood there, full bottle in hand and the taste of scotch in my mouth. It's all so vivid, I can remember it exactly.
I remember thinking that I had just imagined taking that swig, so I took another to make sure. That one felt so good that I thought one more would be okay.
You know, we fight taking a drink day by day, just trying to go a day without tipping a bottle in our mouths. But when you go, you go sip by sip, mouthful by mouthful, until eventually they all blur together.
Each swig I had I took for a very good reason, and soon the reason was 'what the hey!'. I knew Ben would be mad, I knew he would probably cane me, but by that point I didn't give a...care.
When Ben found me I was dancing naked on the coffee table to some slow Janis Joplin, waving the almost empty bottle around. I actually thought that if Ben saw me naked and wanting him that he would overlook my slip and we would just have some fabulous sex together.
I was...wrong.
I smiled at Ben when he came home, laughed and tried to act seductively. Ben didn't say a word.
He came over and pulled the bottle from me and just stood there staring.
I slowly began to realize that my little show wasn't having the affect it was meant to, and that was when I saw the look in his eyes and the way he held the bottle."
Amy took a half breath, her fingers clutched tightly together, her focus deep in her past. She LOOKED scared!
"I can honestly say, that for a brief moment, I was scared sober. It really looked to me that Ben was going to hit me with that bottle. He had hit me before you know, but it was always either self defense or as a part of our discipline. But this time I saw that anger would be the driving force here, and I was scared...to the bone.
Ben took my hand, and led me over to the armchair we used when he caned me. The ropes he used to bind me for caning were already there, a visible reminder of what is supposed to happen to me if I screwed up. He tied me down bent over the back of the chair and without a word took the bottle in the kitchen.
Then he came back with his cane and sat in another chair.
He was so silent.
Ben has always used that great voice of his to advantage when mad at me before, but this time he said nothing.
I was...so scared...so scared that...I wet myself.
I tried pleading with him to have mercy on me, that I was sorry and for sure it wouldn't happen again. I was still drunk though and after my pleas had no affect the liquor began to give me dutch courage. God knows what I was thinking but I began to bitch at him about why I couldn't drink, why I couldn't live my own life for a change. Who gave HIM the right to dictate to me how I lived my life?
My bitching turned to taunting, and a part of me watched horrified as I actually dared him to do his worst with me.
When he did get up I was still yelling at him, and I continued to yell right up until he gagged me.
I was still mad at him until the first blow landed, then it all came back to me what I had done and why I was tied down.
I remember screaming into the gag as each strike hit, begging for him to stop. I pulled so hard on the ropes that bound me that I had deep bruises on my wrists and ankles for days afterwards.
He just kept...hitting me.
In the end I passed out, and I think he kept going but I cant be sure and he wont talk about it.
When I woke up I was still tied down, ungagged but otherwise in the same position. Ben had left me there, alone with a burn in my ass that made me think he had actually set fire to it.
I'm not kidding or exaggerating, but that wasn't the worst. As I regained my senses I could feel that I was standing in something wet. I couldn't see it then, but I had blood from a lot of broken skin pouring down my legs and pooling at my feet.
I cried, my voice was horse from all the yelling I had done into the gag. I was alone and hurt and I felt betrayed by Ben for leaving me.
I don't know how long I was there, but when he did come back I swore long and hard at him.
He had brought something in a bag in with him, but as I swore he put it down and picked up the cane which he had placed out of my sight.
I actually broke a tooth shutting up.
It was like...time stopped for us there, and I often think that at that moment in time the fates were deciding our futures. Remember what I said about needing to be changed inside, and how Ben did it when he truly caned me? Well this was it.
I couldn't take being caned anymore, I simply couldn't. Yet I knew that I no longer had any control over that. No, that's wrong. I DID have control, but that control was in the form of my obedience. I obey, I don't get caned. Simple huh?
It took a while for me to understand just why he had to punish me to protect me, and to anyone else his reasons would sound crazy. But for us...it's right."
Amy paused, and picked at her now cold food.
She looked so small, so vulnerable.
"Did he cane you again?" I asked her carefully.
"No, I guess he saw I was beaten and he fixed me up before untying me. The bag he brought in contained a bunch of stuff for cuts and bruises. He only left me alone because we didn't have anything in the house and he left me tied so I wouldn't do any more damage to myself than he had already done.
He had chewed up my ass pretty badly, some of the worst damage being up high by my tail bone and that was what hurt the most too. I couldn't work for days, couldn't sit down for longer, and having the dressings changed was murder as dried blood would make them stick to me and pulling the dressings off meant pulling off the scabs.
In the end I went without bandages and simply stayed bare below the waist for a while."
She paused again.
"Ben didn't talk to me for two days, and pretty much ignored me for that whole time too. He left the almost empty bottle of scotch on the kitchen counter, as a test I think. All I had to do was pick it up and finish it off. But I knew that if I did then WE would be finished, for there was no way I could take another beating like that and I found out later that Ben wouldn't have been able to give me one. If I fell now I would have felt beyond redemption. In the end that bottle sat untouched for several months before Ben poured it out himself. But for a couple of days Ben was so mad at me and so disgusted at himself for beating me till I was hamburger that he couldn't bring himself to talk to me. But we made up, and I haven't had a drop of alcohol since."
"Thank you for telling me." I said to her after we had sat quietly for a bit.
Amy nodded, her face flushed, she looked close to tears.
"Don, would you mind...I need to be alone for a bit."
"Sure." I said, nodding slowly. I left the booth and climbed topside.
Night had fallen, swiftly as it does at these latitudes, and I walked the deck in the darkness.
It had stopped raining, but the sky was still overcast for I could see no stars, and the island next to us was invisible now although I could hear it, the wind moving the trees.
No, not quite invisible. At the summit was a small spot of light, maybe a camp fire. Ben's camp I assumed.
I wondered if my wife had been caught by Ben yet, and figured she probably had been. No nature lover was she, the jungle was NOT her element. Had the chase taken place in a Mall then Ben might have had his work cut out for him.
I sat in a deck chair and thought about my wife, and the girl below me. Two such different people, each on a different road. Yet those roads had turned in one common direction and were beginning to merge into one. Laura and Amy, from such widely different backgrounds were becoming a lot alike on the surface, but deep down they were so different.
Our life histories shaped us, whether we wanted them to or not.
I had been sitting in the warm night air for about an hour when I heard bare feet padding on the deck behind me.
I turned, it was Amy of course, but she was naked again, her dress left behind some place below.
She knelt by my side.
"Sir, could we please...I...I think it might be best if we went back to being...Master and slave." she said.
"Are you sure? Don't you think you could use a friend instead?" I asked her kindly.
"No, Sir. I don't need a friend, I need a Master. Being an...equal, is too hard to deal with right now. Please, Sir, let me be happy!"
She put her hands and head in my lap and looked up at me, her dark eyes wide and glistening in the glow from the mast light.
"Very well, slave. You're back on duty." I told her.
"Thank you, Sir." she said with a small smile.
"Anything else?" I asked with a chuckle.
"Weeelllll, there is one more thing, Sir." she said, beginning to blush.
"What?"
"There is one thing I need almost as much as a Master."
"What's that?"
"Sir, this low girl reminds you that she did swear in your presence, and that she is fully resigned to being taken sexually by yourself with no mercy given as punishment for that crime."
I almost laughed, but managed to hold on to the role I was expected to play. As I followed her below I thought about my wife alone with Ben, and hoped that the two of them were going to have as much fun as the two of us, after all, with Ben gone, it was up to me to maintain this subbie's level of discipline.
Duty called!
End of Part 27